God Of The Poles
by ambie-lee-smiley-chanX3
Summary: Nate River.Out of home. Out of luck. Out of everything. After being kicked out of home he puts in an application for an apartment with Mail Jeevas. After admitting to not being able to pay up, Mail offers to get him a job.But Was he really that desprate?
1. Welcome to Hell, Nate River

**A/n: Ta-da! Another one you say? Yes : ) This one is another awkward plot bunny that liked to chew on my brain for a few days before I started to type this up. By the way: MAIL (Matt's name) is pronounced MILE. Just thought that I would clear that up. It's in an AU. Enjoy ~**

**Chapter 1:**

"Hello?"

A young man answered his phone in the early hours of the morning.

"Hey! Is this Nate?"

"Ah huh."

Nate shielded his eyes from the thin rays of bright sun that penetrated his small room.

"Oh. Good! It's Matt. I just wanted to ask you how your search for a new apartment is going."

A rough voice coughed loudly through the earpiece of Nate's mobile. The white haired teen held the phone away from his ear as if it had a disease.

"Wait. Who did you say this was?" Nate asked sleepily as he rubbed his eyes. An exasperated sigh came over the line.

"I said it's Matt. I'm just calling about the apar-"

"I never asked any 'Matt' for an apartment did I?" Nate opened his blinds to be welcomed with the sight of another apartment.

Ah the beautiful city life.

"Fine. I'm Mail. Mail Jeevas. Remember? You called the other day about the spare room in my place."

"Oh! _Mail! _Why didn't you say so? So is the room still free?"

He listened for a few moments until the line went dead. With sudden panic he shook the phone with panic. He flicked it open to find that it was still perfectly fine. Mail's line must have gone dead. Not his. He let out a sigh of relief. At least he couldn't be blamed for losing the apartment because he hung up. Crap. He really did need that room though. A loud knock on the door made him jump. He creaked the door open slowly to see a tall good looking redhead grinning at him.

"Ey. Is this River's place?" The man pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it.

"Yeah. It's Nate right here. What's going on Mail?"

Nate was in awe of this man in front of him. He knew that Mail was hardly older than he was, not even a month over nineteen. But Mail looked like a supermodel, and at least twenty-two at the youngest. Another wide grin split the red-heads clean shaven face.

"You got the room. Pack up your shit and get yourself moved in by-' he checked his watch 'Ten O'clock tonight. I'll give you the key then. Any later and you'll miss me cause I'll be at work and you'll have to sleep in the hall. Got it? You should remember the address, right?"

Nate nodded slowly.

"Goodie! See ya then."

Nate was left with nothing but a wave and the smell of Mail's smoke.

With a duffle bag slung over his shoulder and a milk crate dragging behind him, eighteen year old Nate Rivers was an out-of-home, out-of-luck, out of, well everything. Once his parents kicked him out a year beforehand, everything had gone to hell for him. After he had asked for money to get into university his father threw him out on the streets.

"_Men go to school to learn how to build! Not to keep no-good-nicks out of court!"_

Were the last words his idiot father had said to him. And that was two hours after being asked to go from his second last year of high school fast tracked to higher studies. So within the week Nate Rivers was in an empty house until it turned out that a nice couple had bought it and had decided to move in and find a snoring teenager on their floor. They called the police within moments, so he was right back on the street.

Mail's apartment was in a nice clean building in the centre of the city. As Nate dragged his luggage up the stairs (Thanks to a broken elevator) he noticed that the door was open to Mail's place.

_What the hell?_

"Hey? Are you there?"

A mop of red hair popped out of the door frame, his permanent grin still plastered on his face.

"Nate! You made it here!" Mail whooped and grabbed Nate's pale white hand firmly between his.

"Oh. Yeah I did make it here. Do you want me to put my things in the room?"

"Go 'head. It's your place now" Matt turned away and walked backed inside.

Nate sighed and followed the older man inside.

It seemed that Mail had re-decorated since he had last had anybody check out the spare room for rent. Clothes were strewn on the floor, furniture and even the windowsill. Nate watched in horror as Mail walked out of what he assumed was the other males' bedroom completely naked. The (naked) red-head looked in the blushing albino's direction and upon realising what seemed to be embarrassing him, laughed.

"What are you blushing for? You have a dick too dontcha?"

This comment seemed to make Nate redden even more.

"Of course I do! But I'm just not -ah- used to..."

"Seeing another man's? Wow you sure are reserved." Mail giggled like a little girl and wiggled his completely exposed buttocks in the other teen's direction.

Nate nearly died of mortification.

It didn't take him long to move his things in and set them up. It's not like he had much in the first place. A few changes of clothes, mainly oversized white shirts he had borrowed from a friend who had let him crash for a few weeks who had told him to keep them. His two pairs of loose pants bottoms were old and looked like pyjamas. Not very fashionable, not that he cared. Not after making a nice little space that he could tolerate for the time being. At least until he remembered another pressing matter that came to mind.

"Ahm. Mail?" Her chirped nervously to Mail who was now shaving his already silky smooth face.

"Yup?"

"Um. I have a problem about the room..."

"Oh shi- you didn't find anything...personal did you?"

"Personal?"

"Like a spare condo-"

"No! No! Nothing like that!"

"Then what?" Mail rubbed his jaw line clearly happy that he had gotten rid of already non-existent stubble.

"I can't pay rent."

"...What do you mean you can't pay the rent?"

"I can't pay." Nate replied simply.

"Well smartass can I ask why?" Mail was visibly frustrated. He wasn't smiling anymore.

"I don't have a job. Not anymore."

"Oh that's all? Aw easy fixed I say! I can put a good word in for you at my work tonight! See? Easy fixed!"

"T-thank you! Do I need a resume?"

"No but you will need to try out. You are fit aren't you?"

"Reasonably. Why? "

"That is all. Goodbye."

And with that Mail pushed the confused teen out of the bathroom.

The street was dimly lit by broken street lights and sleazy neon signs as Mail's sleek car drove through the back alleys of the city. Nate's head was pressed firmly against the cold frosted glass as he fogged up the window and drew on it.

"You would think that you'd never ridden in a nice car like this before kiddo."

Nate's head snapped off the glass quickly

"I'm only a year younger than you! Don't call me kiddo!"

"Fine. So if it's not too much to ask," Mail began as he bit on a chocolate bar thoughtfully

"If you can't pay rent now, how could you afford to live before?"

A sly grin spread over the younger boys face which was highlighted by a dull blue glow.

"I was supposed to be fast tracked into university last year."

"Oh yeah? What happened?"

"Didn't have the money. So I was told by my dad anyway. Turns out he had quite a stash of money in his savings account didn't he?"

"How'd you find that out?"

Nate chuckled softly.

"I did advanced computer studies. It was not that hard to get in my dad's bank. Just took a couple thousand until the account was suddenly closed."

Matt's permanent grin widened.

"I could do that in my sleep. Not that hard. I'm just lucky that I have a well paying job."

Mail's car swerved around an intersection into another road littered with flashy signs. As they turned into a carpark around the back of a very bright and very alive building, Nate scooted away from the redhead who had begun to unbutton his tight shirt.

"Woah! Put your shirt back on!"

"I'm getting ready for work."

"Aren't you a bouncer or something?"Nate looked away respectfully.

Mail laughed roughly

"I ain't tank enough to be a body guard or a bouncer. I'm to lean. All of my strength is in my abbs."

"Oh."

Mail opened the car door and slammed it behind him loudly. Nate followed suit and coughed as the smell of stale smoke attacked his senses.

"Get used to it kid. This is where you are gonna work if you get the job."

"A nightclub?"

"Yeah. A nightclub."

Matt pushed the door marked 'employees only' and zipped up a fur vest right under his clean shaven chin. The other men who stood in the hallway inside looked at the white haired boy who trailed behind inconspicuously as he smiled weakly at the people who did pay attention. Mail banged on the door marked 'Manager' loudly.

"Hey Linda open the door. I gotta new applicant."

"Matt you ass! You know that I don't anybody new working the bars! Tell him to piss off!"

Mail rolled his eyes and mouthed the word '_bitch_' to Nate who replied with the ghost of a smile.

"He's pretty decent looking. Probably has a firm set too."

A frustrated grunt was muffled through the door as a woman swung the door open to be greeted with the grinning crimson haired man. She brushed her blonde bangs out of her eyes and looked Nate up and down thoughtfully.

"He's a bit on the small side."

"He's been livin' on the streets, so he would be pretty fit. C'mon give the kid a chance. He has to pay me rent y'know. Don't want to see a pretty looking boy like him knee-capped now would you? "

The blonde rubbed her temples and gave Nate the once-over again.

"Fine. Get him on the bars. Chop chop."

Mail brushed his hands along the woman's cheek and kissed it softly.

"Thanks babe, ya wont regret it."

"Leave me alone you whore." She mumbled as she closed her door.

"Why did she call you Matt?"

"Cause that me name here."

"I don't have a bartending licence. I can't work on a bar here legally."

Mail gave him a strange look and then laughed loudly.

"Not that sorta bar I promise mate. You are really eighteen right?"

Nate nodded in reply as he watched the smoke get thicker and the music suddenly get a lot louder. As they pushed the door in front of them open the fog blinded him. The music was so ridiculously loud that he thought that his ears were going to fall off.

"Mail!" He tried to yell over the deafening noise that rumbled over everything.

"Call me Matt at work!"

"Matt! Where am I supposed to work I can't see a damn thing!"

A sudden force grasped him around the waist and he was pulled into a clearer spot, almost like a catwalk. He listened to the racket around him trying to decipher who was making it.

A very large amount of women he guessed.

"Mai-Matt? Is it ladies night?"

"It's always ladies night here! Now listen to me. I'm going to introduce you to the crowd as a new member so not to go to hard on you okay?"

Nate nodded.

"And you are going to be working the bar over there. Next to him."

"Who?"

"I'll call him over. Oi Mello! Come and show the new kid how to use the bars." Mail waved a very well-built and sweaty man over to him. The only thing that Nate had noticed was that everybody here except for _most _of the women, that they seemed to be shirtless. And oiled. Things were slowly beginning to click in Nate's brain as Mello grabbed his hand and shook it.

"You better not fuck this up for me. I'll show you how to swing. Hurry up." The man Mello might have looked like an alright guy from your first look at him, but it didn't take long for you to figure out that this guy was the sort of guy who kicks puppies and eats babies. On a good day. He was dragged through a velvet curtain to the screams of many women.

"Now." Mello looked him at him swiftly. "Your name is now Near. 'Cause your _near _perfect bodywise. This is your stage." He pointed to the catwalk and Nate's eye's followed. "And that is your tool." He lifted his finger up to a metal pole that stood in the middle of the strip. Nate-no-Near gasped. This wasn't a job on 'the bar.'

It was literal.

He was working on a bar alright.

In the middle of a strip club.

Nate gulped.

He didn't think that he was this desperate for money.

**Ta-ta till next chapter :D**

**ambie-lee-smiley-chanX3**


	2. Dancing is sex with clothes on!

Chapter 2: Dancing is just sex with clothes on!

"I can't do this...I cannot work here!" Nate grabbed onto Mello's arm anxiously.

"It ain't like you already have self respect, plus we get chicks from all around followin' us after shows."

Mello stretched his legs and cracked his well-built neck loudly. He swung his leg around the large metal bar and grasped it firmly. Mello cocked his eyebrow at the white haired teen that was standing further away from him than ever.

"I don't feel comfortable doing this..." Nate started and Mello rolled his ice blue eyes with frustration.

"All you have to do is this." Mello swung his muscular tanned leg around the pole tightly and pulled himself up. He then released one hand and swung his torso back. He then flicked his golden hair out of his eyes, a wide white grin followed and Nate blushed and hugged his exposed body self-consciously.

"I-I can't do anything fancy like that!"

"Just do what I did! If you do it well enough we might even be able to throw you on stage tonight!"

As Nate copied Mello's actions of wrapping his leg around the metal post he shuddered as he felt the hot-cold feeling of the part where the older man had been, and where no skin had brushed the metal. He grasped the bar and grunted as he pushed himself up.

"Oh! I did it!"

"All you did was push yourself up the pole. No one said anything about it being done. You're hanging to low on the pole by the way."

"Huh?" Nate scooted himself up, failing miserably.

"Fuck me dead." The blonde haired man shook his head and walked over to the struggling teenager.

"Oi. I'll give ya a hand."

"Thanks."

Mello walked behind the white haired boy and placed his hands on the other males small rear and pushed. Nate squealed as Mello held onto his ass tightly and pushed him up the pole further than before.

"Get your hands off my ass you pervert!"

"Oh~ touchy,touchy! Do we have a little virgin on our hands ne?" Mello winked as the pale boys face began to redden.

"It doesn't take much to get you all uncomfortable hey?" Mello began to fiddle with the small amount of clothing he had on searching for something. "Ah! So Nate I have to have you all fixed up and ready to run in just under two hours. Won't this be a fucking joyride." Mello rubbed his temples as he pulled out a small piece of chocolate and bit into thoughtfully. He was snapped back to reality as he heard a small squeak and a slow dragging sound. Nate's body had begun to pull itself down the post slowly, his arms clinging onto the metal for his life.

"You're completely useless. Now hurry up cause I gotta get prepared soon."

**...**

"Oii you two! Show's bout to start!" Linda called as she pushed the velvet curtain open. "It's a full house so pucker up and sell the sex!"

Nate gulped as he watched the other men limber their toned bodies. They were god like. His thin pale chest looked miniscule compared to the others.

But they were nice at least.

"Heyy! Nate! You're up second to last! So at least if you screw up the women would be too drunk to remember!" Mail had slapped him on the back hard and Nate coughed noisily.

"I really don't want to do this."

"You earn a crap load of money when you work here I promise! Once you get on your feet you'll be a bombshell!"

"Matt stop flirting with the newbie! Give him a chance to get used to the atmosphere before you blow him away!" Linda's blonde hair was sitting on her defined face beautifully. Matt grinned his usual smiled and licked her cheek softly.

"Why would I blow him away when I could blow you?

"Get of the cocaine Matt. It's screwed up ya head. You ain't gotta chance with me ever!"

"That's not what you said last weekend!"

She flicked Mail on the forehead and began to push the blind open again. She looked at the light for a moment before she smiled at Nate with encouragement.

"Good luck kiddo."

The teen groaned.

"Don't call me kiddo..."

**...**

"Hello ladies! And not to mention gentlemen!" Linda winked as she scanned the crowded building and was greeted with a loud cheer and a roar of wolf whistles.

"Now we all know that you have been waiting for our gorgeous men to come out and play, so why delay your satisfaction? I introduce to you a veteran around our glamorous stage, Matt!"

The crowed began to bellow as Matt wandered out onto the stage stretching his tanned legs and cracking his neck. He winked at a young woman who had thrown her phone number under his feet.

"So ladies and gents, the pole has been reserved for a short while so I may have to work the ground a little more than usual if that's fine ne?"

The crowd yelled its approval.

A slow thumping beat boomed from the speakers.

"_There she goes, shakin' that ass on the floor bumpin' and grindin' that pole, the way she's grindin' that pole I think I'm losing control!_"

A woman's loud voice called from the audience "I'm losing control to Matt!"

Another wide grin from the red-haired man as he slowly pulled his fur jacket off and let it slide down his toned body.

As he winked and licked his lips and began to slip out of his jeans it was almost comical the amount of blood that the spectators lost from their nose from sudden nosebleeds. If Matt ever wanted to kill a person, all he had to do was lose his shirt simple as that.

**...**

"_She clings to me like cellophane, fake plastic submarine, slowly driving me insane but now that's over!_"

Mello had prepared, and his 'costume' fit with his choice of song perfectly.

'Clings to me like cellophane'?

Well they got the cling and the cellophane right.

Mello with his long legs and his toned stomach was covered from head to toe in the colourful plastic, each individual piece falling off slowly and seductively.

The blonde had his leg around the metal bar and was grinding it, the cellophane on his crotch falling off revealing a black g-string.

The audience gasped and began to chatter excitedly as Mello moaned loudly.

"_So what if the sex was great? Just a temporary escape, another thing I grew to hate but now that's over!_"

Mello raked his hands down his figure tearing each item from his body smoothly.

"_Why~? Why do you always kick me when I'm, high~ kick me down till we see eye to, eye! She may not be Miss right but she'll be all right for now!_"

Mello would never need to charm a woman. His sex appeal was ridiculous. He was the kind of man who could turn a straight man in the moment of screwing a very sexy woman, into a submissive and pleading uke.

That's a very scary power.

**...**

Two other men had performed after the firecrackers known as Matt and Mello, if rubbing themselves on the metal bar was a performance, had eventually left Nate and another man, A-something.

He hadn't even chosen the song he was supposed to get the crowd riled up with. All he was told was that it was "The bomb." By A-something. He seriously had to background checks on people he was considering living with. Or else it would turn into something like humping a metal pole.

"Nate! I mean Near! Get your small ass out there! The mob wants their newcomer!" Linda pushed the white haired boy out onto the stage, like a deer in the headlights of a very, very large and noisy truck.

[][][]

"So, I hear that you've all been expecting our newcomer?" Nate felt the wind from the yells of the mass.

"Here he is! Welcome Near!"

Nate could feel the heat from his cheeks rush all over his body. If the blush on his face was red enough, he might turn into a complete beetroot.

The stage was an intimidating place when you're half naked and being observed by every person in the room. A fast and heavy, almost metal sounding, beat rang through the speakers. Nate froze. What the hell was he supposed to do!

"_All aboard. Hit the road. All the bullshit to be ignored. Its hard to place, hit the face, cause a commotion!_

Nate's black eyes scanned the club quickly as each woman and man's eyes stared at him hopefully. He then spotted a furry hood leaning against the back wall. The person with the hood flicked their head to reveal a head of blonde hair.

'_Mello! What's he doing?_'

Nate watched Mello rub his hand along his face and point at the frozen boy on the stage as if encouraging him to do the same.

Nate followed suit and copied the other, causing the audience to whoop and encourage him even more.

The loud music in the background screamed as Nate grinned and rolled his neck.

"_All my problems make me wanna go, like a bad girl straight to video! Now my darling welcome to the show your my silver plated stereo!_"

The white hair on Nate's head was messy within moments of his spidery fingers running through it, the curly locks frizzing. The lights that shone so forcefully on the teens marble white body made him sweat, causing a brilliant shiny sheen of sweat to cover him.

He didn't even care that he was pretty much naked anymore.

"_Hiyde-ho. Here we go. Loss of motion no undertow. Quite a tear, quite a pair. No box office."_

"Woo!" Nate yelled as the music began to play its chorus.

"_All my problems make me wanna go like a bad girl straight to video, Now my darling welcome to the show, your my silver plated stereo."_

Mello had continued to help Nate along by motioning that he should wrap his legs around the pole, just as practised. Mello sniggered as he saw Nate stop momentarily, contemplating this next bold move.

Nate whooped again as he strutted towards the bar. His arms wrapped the metal tenderly as he pressed his torso into it slowly, even giving a slight moan in the audiences direction.

Mail yawned as he gave Mello a slight push in the back.

"That kids doin' alright isn't he?"

"He is actually. I thought that he would shit himself on the spot when we put him out there."

"Yeah well I guess he has a bit of self-confidence when it comes down to the crunch hey? See I was so right."

"Nah you weren't. I was the one who had to grab his ass and push him up the pole."

"You would have loved that."

"So would you dickhead."

"Sorry Mels, but I still prefer women."

Nate had the whole place completely riled up. As he ground the pole, the song began to fade out.

"_You're so amazing! A-a-amazing!_"

The loud claps and roar from the crowd made Nate's knees almost buckle.

For the first time in his life, he was being praised for something.

...

"Woah nice job dude!"

"Nice! I haven't seen anyone in a while who could almost give a woman an orgasm from just lookin' at her!"

"Ah well now we might just have to bash ya!"

Nate smiled at the complements, and as Mello walked through the doors and nodded at him quickly, Nate had to restrain himself from hugging him.

"You did well young grasshopper!" Mail bellowed as he bowed towards the teen.

"C'mon Mels, say how well he did!"

Nate looked at Mello expectantly.

Mello's blue eyes closed and his forehead creased.

Nate's hand was suddenly enclosed in Mello's larger one.

"I'm Miheal."

**Bwhaha! Sorry for the long update, but my brain kind of fried and I was on holiday :P **

**Did you like Nate's first performance? He must think highly of himself now...oh well I'm sure someone can beat him down a bit. Fufufu.**

**The songs used:**

**Mail's song: Shake That by Eminem.**

**Miheal's song: Right Now(Kick me when I'm high) by S71**

**Nate's song: Straight To Video by Mindless Self Indulgence.**

**C'mon guys! Send me ideas! What would you like to see happen? :D**

**Till next time**

**Amber-lee-smiley-chanX3**


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